Where Did it All Go so Wrong?
by Tazz Dieudonne
Summary: Set after the Avengers. For weeks now Tony and Loki have been making love in secret. Then one night it all goes wrong. Can Tony repair the damage? Does he even want to? Written in snippets. Frost/iron. Rated for violence, angst, and sex. Finished!
1. Chapter 1

Steel to my trembling lips How did the night ever get like this?

A thick purple bruise covered the lower portion of his jaw from last night's late night visit. Tony had underestimated the gods strength, he figured Loki was more of a slapping man rather then a punching man. But there was the bruise. One misplaced snide comment and there it was.

They had been like this for three weeks sense Loki had appeared once again in Stark Tower. He came with a offer Tony couldn't resist. Loki had left many _marks _on him, but this one was different, Tony knew, as he studied it in the mirror.

Normally Loki didn't lash out in anger at him. Usually one of his comments was greeted with a little reminder of who was in control, a well placed blow intended to send him helpless to the floor or bed. But never uncontrollable anger. Never a blow to the face intended to cause pain, and not the good kind.

It was about his father he knew. Stark had not anticipated Loki being so touchy about the subject. Loki had been confiding in him a dark moment of the past, the story of how he found out he wasn't Thor's brother. Tony had snapped at him with a snide comment when the god was at his lowest.

"So your fathers suddenly falls asleep right after telling you your adopted? How nice for him. He didn't have to explain why." Loki's fist was unanticipated and well placed. knocking Tony off the bed and to the floor with a smarting chin. Tony knew by the look in the god's eyes he had done wrong. He once again exploited someone's weakness just because they had revealed it to him. Tony felt rotten. How could he have done that?

Then the trickster had vanished. He had not reappeared the next night. The next day Tony was called in by SHIELD. Loki had been spotted, mischief was afoot. They needed Ironman to investigate. Tony swallowed hard, this was going to be a difficult assignment.


	2. Chapter 2

waking up my mind as I throw a fit The breakin' is takin' me down, down, down

The right arm of the ironman suit was crushed. He was working on another one, the lab was a mess. His focus today was the hand. He wanted to make the blast stronger and more direct. Tony had just put in the final measurements, it was testing time!

The glass windows were the first to go. Shattering in to a million pieces the minute the ray hit them. There was something satisfying in turning wildly around his work room, searching for the next victim, shooting at imaginary enemies. They all wore the face of Loki. They all spoke with his soft voice. Tony only stopped when every glass window was shattered. Anger and adrenaline flooded his system.


	3. Chapter 3

Sick of being tired and sick and ready for another kind of fix

It had been a weak sense the incident. Loki had come for sex twice. Each time appearing suddenly and teleporting Stark from his lab to the bed instantly. It was hot and intense, Loki's greedy hands ripping apart Tonys clothes. But they never kissed it was just passion. Loki always left quickly after, with out a word or a backwards glance. He left Tony unsatisfied and waiting for more.

The bruise was long gone and so were the previous marks of ownership. There were a few small scars, one under his ear from Loki constantly biting there, and countless marks of frost bite on his back. They would heal in time but his touch would never fade.

The way Loki's fingers ran along his body, tender and loving. The way Loki gripped him when he took him, strong and commanding. His teasing fingers playing with Tony's hair as his twisted smile played with Tony's mind. When Loki would ruffly shove him down, showing him who's boss. The danger in his voice when Stark would challenge him as he pushed the smaller man to the wall intimidating eyes baring in to his soul. Yes the memories would never fade but the marks would.


	4. Chapter 4

One shot and the whiskey goes down, down, down Bottom of the bottle hits 

It was late night the chick whom he had just ditched stood in shock as he left. He wasn't interested in sex, not the kind that was quick and meaningless. He had had enough of that! For once he wanted sex to be connected with something more. Not that Stark often maintained a relationship, in fact almost never. He supposed he used to have a relationship with Loki. Used to. Not any more.

The uncomfortable bar stool didn't help to improve his mood. He should have just gone home. This was too public. He had tried to look like any other ordinary bar attender but he was already attracting looks. Having his face plastered all over the city was a major rush but once in a while, a grand while mind you, it had it's draw backs.

Taking a sip from his nearly empty cup, the fifth if he remembered right, Tony's head sank to the counter. It felt good, the alcohol running wiled through his system blocking out all thoughts. The familiar haze set on his mind as he became gradually less aware of his surroundings. Every thing was beginning to blur together. How many drinks had he ordered? What time was it?

There was a clock on the wall behind the fat guy running the bar but the hands wouldn't stay still. Some times there was three and sometimes there was six. Tony laughed thinking of how confusing it would bee if all the clocks acted like that. Nobody would ever know what time it was!


	5. Chapter 5

save me cause I'm fallin' now I can't seem to breathe right

After a fight with one of the other men at the bar, pot bellied and bearded, they threw him out on his ass. Tony landed hard, the pain from colliding with the pavement clearing his mind slightly but then it went back to being hazy. He walked along the streets wandering towards home. Tony knew the town well so even in his drunken sate he made it to the door way.

The pain in his side, from were a unseen lamppost had attacked him, was easy to ignore. There was a pounding in his head, characteristic of a hangover but it was still dark and he was plastered drunk. In the morning he would sort things out.


	6. Chapter 6

Everything I've seen twice now it's time I realized it's spinning back around now

The morning sunlight was harsh to his eyes. His head pounded and his mouth felt dry. His stomach rumbled but he felt more like throwing up rather then eating. Tony stood up to do just that as his stomach turned over. He barely made it too the bathroom in time.

With the amount that had come up there must be nothing left in his stomach. He wasn't thinking clearly and his head still really hurt. In his current condition Tony decided to taek some bad advice some one had once given him. 'The best cure to a hang over is to drink more'.

Taking a step towards the kitchen Tony stumbled, his balance was shot. He caught himself on the sink and ended up staring in to the mirror. He looked like shit. His clothes were all messed up, his shirt torn and stained. But his face was the worst. A pained expression filled the mirror, from the pounding in his head. His head! There was dried blood all over his cheek and matted in his hair. He must have hit something, or been hit. Dizziness once again clouded his brain.

He couldn't think straight. How had this all occurred? He couldn't remember. Suddenly he felt very tired and his hands slipped from the sink. Tony hit the floor with a sickening thud. The world was blurry and object suddenly had identical twins. Were these the usual after effects of drinking? He couldn't think he couldn't remember. All he wanted to do was sleep. Sleep...

Wait! He had to know! He had to think! What was going on? "Jarvis...what...?" He choked out his brain not able to make any more words.

"You may have a concussion sir."

"Shit..." Tony's curse was more of a slur. He was losing consciousness fast. "Call..." The world went black.


	7. Chapter 7

Whoa, I'm coming alive Whoa, I'll wake up now and live

"Dear Odin! What has the genius gone and done to himself now! Stark! Stark!" The voice seamed to come from far away bringing Tony out of his deep sleep. He didn't want to be disturbed so he buried himself deeper in to the darkness. "Anthony Stark! I swear if you don't wake up...!" He knew that voice. That bothersome voice intent on waking him. But where from...?

LOKI! The trickster had come to visit him! Why wouldn't Loki just leave him alone. He didn't want to see the god. Not now. There was still so much to figure out so much to think...but he couldn't think. That voice. That dam voice! Dragging him awake.

"Stark! Stark! Wake your sorry self up this very moment!" Loki commanded. No! Tony thought trying to escape the god's voice, but then something cold and blue caught him. Loki's magic dragged his reluctant conscious back to his body.


	8. Chapter 8

Round and around I go Addicted to the numb livin' in the cold

Tony opened his eyes. A very pissed god of mischief was cradling Tony's head in his hands. His vision was blurry but at least he was no longer seeing double. A tear made it's way down Loki's angry face. "Stark..." He choked.

" 'ame's Tony." He slurred. His brain not properly forming the words.

"Tony?" Loki's voice was softer. His face filled with relief. "It's going to be alright. It's all going to be okay." Loki breathed becoming calmer.

"What...?"

"You have a head injury. Can you understand me." Loki's eyes showed concern. Tony tried to respond but the trickster put a hand over his mouth. " Lift your right arm if you can understand me." Tony obeyed. Loki breathed a sigh of relief again. "Will you let me heal you? Right arm 'yes' left arm 'no'." Tony raised his right arm again. Loki closed his eyes. He put his hands on Tony's forehead, "Heal." He spoke softly.


	9. Chapter 9

it's spinning back around now On this road I'm crawlin'

"Why?" Tony asked softly. It had been a weak sense the injury. Tony was completely healed but Loki insisted he remain in bed. Tony had contacted the others and told them he was going to be gone for the next few weeks. The reason he was even alive to say that was perched on the edge of his bed shifting uncomfortably at the question. "Why did you heal me?" Loki had visited him often but this was the first time Tony had got him to stay long enough to talk.

"You would be dead if not." Loki's expression was unreadable.

"Then why not let me die? Why do you come back? Why did you heal me?"

"I have my reasons."

"Tell me!"

"One day..."

"But not today." Tony finished. "I need to know."

"Why?"

"Yes I need to know why!" Tony snapped.

"Why do you ask?"

"I want to know what I mean to you! Why you come back after all this time! All this trouble! Why didn't you just let me die if I'm nothing to you! I'm sure there are a thousand mortals that you could seduce! Why me!?" Tony sat up shouting now. Still the god's expression didn't change. He wouldn't look at Tony.

"If you do not wish me I will go." Loki stood up quietly.

"No...!" Tony realized to late he had once again driven the god off. Loki disappeared. "That's not what I meant you bastard!"


	10. Chapter 10

cause I keep runnin runnin runnin runnin runnin runnin runnin runnin! runnin from my heart!

A tear made it's way down his cheek and Tony brushed it away angrily. The fool hadn't come back! That son of a bitch! Tony nearly spilled his coffee in anger. It was early morning, today he was going to go back to SHIELD and apologize for being absent. But instead he waisted time in the kitchen. Then he had thought of Loki Now he was in a bad mood. Could this day get any worse? Well if Loki showed his face it could, Tony joked with himself, better not to think on that then.

But some were deep in his heart Stark wanted Loki to reappear again, no questions asked, no fights, no buts, no ifs, just Loki and him without a care in the world.


	11. Chapter 11

My heart's beating faster I know what I'm after 

It was late at night and he was in the lab. Tony was able to take readings off of Loki's magic and was working on a tracker. He was determined to see the god again He was going to make things right! Sighing he wiped the screen clear of the equations he was working with.

Staring out at the deck a movement caught his eyes. There was a familiar shape outside his window! Horns! Like that of a ram were outlined by the moon behind them. It was LOKI!

Tony rushed out of the lab and up the stairs to the deck. He burst out in to the cold night air breathing hard. Loki turned startled.

"You... came back!" He panted.

"I..." Loki was startled and confused. "I was going..."

"You're staying!" Tony commanded.

"I..."

"You are going to stay!" Tony said striding over. The god shrank at his touch as Tony, gently but firmly, gripped his arm.

"I want answers." But even as he said it Loki started to disappear. His arm turning from solid flesh to green mist.

"Give me time." Loki whispered as he left, cold green eyes holding Tony's brown ones.


	12. Chapter 12

I've been standing here my whole life Everything I've seen twice now it's time I realized 

It was times like this that Tony wished he could fly unprotected. To feel the cold air on his skin. So it could dry his tears. Tony flew his ironman suit towards the island. This is where he had traced Loki's magic to.

Tears trickled down his face as he flew closer and closer. How could Loki just leave like that? It had been a month, that was time enough in Tony's mind. For a whole month he had wandered. He paced waiting for the god to return. He jumped at any sound. He work day and night without sleep on the tracer. All the pent up frustration and sadness was making its way to the surface. Why had the man come back after that night? Why had he healed Stark? It he was that important why wouldn't Loki admit it? The questions buzzed around his head, questions he had been avoiding for a month. They wouldn't leave him alone now that he was so close. So close to seeing the god again.


	13. Chapter 13

The higher, the lower the down, down, down

"How long are you going to run from me?" Tony sat next to the god. He had chased Loki through the forest all day till the trickster finally gave up. They sat together now watching the sun go down. Loki was too tired to run again so he stayed still, not looking at Stark. "You said to give you time, I have, so now what's the verdict?" Loki shifted uncomfortably. "You know I don't like being kept waiting."

"I..." Loki took a deep breath. "I had no intention of it ending up like this."

"What did you picture it like."

"I thought..." Loki gulped. "I thought you would turn me in to SHIELD after you got your pleasure."

"How could you think that?" Tony was astonished.

"Stark you must have felt unsafe as well. We are suppose to be worst enemies trying to kill each other how could we ever trust each other? Tell me you weren't expecting a knife in your back at any second."

"I..." Well he was, even now.

"Then after...that one night." Tony instantly knew what he was talking about, the bruise. "I couldn't bring my self to get any more involved. I was angry. I didn't know what I wanted. I didn't know what I felt. Why I felt this way towards you."

"So you still came back for sex. I must be pretty good." Tony smirked. Loki looked away not commenting.

"You should know that I slept with many other mortals after that night." Loki stated it as a fact not something he should be ashamed of.


	14. Chapter 14

The damage is damming me down down down

Tony shoved Loki to the ground, hard. He knelt down and straddled the god.

"Well then I'm going to have to punish you." In all honesty Tony was furious. Loki was his possession! He didn't take kindly to the thought of Loki with someone else. Tony bent down and bit in to the soft flesh at the base of the trickster's neck, he would make Loki pay. Loki gasped.

"Feisty are we." Loki murmured in to Tony's ear.

"Shut up." Tony whispered.

"Make me." Loki smiled. Tony sealed his lips with a passionate kiss. Tony's tung slid in to Loki's mouth exploring and re-learning the mouth knew by heart a month ago. Loki gripped his hair holding Tony's head there as he began to bite Tony's lower lip. They broke apart for air. Stark slipped his shirt off smoothly and began to work on Loki's extravagant costume. Loki smiled and took Tony's head in his hands, kissing him again.

Loki's cloths began to disappear under Stark's hands but he didn't brake the kiss. Tony nibbled at Loki's lower lip and the god moaned in to Tony's mouth. He pulled away. Tony smirked as he noticed the man was no longer wearing any cloths, Loki's excitement was evident. Tony felt a tug at the crotch of his own pants but this time he wanted it to be different, he wanted to make the god beg.

Tony began slowly to kiss his way down Loki's body, admiring every muscle held by ivory skin. He bit and sucked as he when earning moans and sighs from the god as his need grew. Tony brought his hands in to play and grabbed Loki's things biting harder in to the place right above this cock.

Loki writhed and sweated with the anticipation. Tony's hands worked their way down lower to Loki's tender butt cheeks staying there and working the soft flesh beneath them, fingers slipping in to the hole between them. Loki moved beneath him pressing their bodies even closer trying to get off on Stark's fingers.

"Not yet." Tony whispered intent on making Loki wait. He swiftly flipped the man over and pressed him in to the ground. "Your going to have to beg." Tony pressed his body to Loki's showing the man his need.

"I don't...beg...to...mortals." Loki's voice was shaky and interrupted with shutters and moans. Tony gripped Loki by the neck holding him to the ground. He knew that the god might kill him for this so he was strong and commanding.

"Well then." Tony sat up and swiftly backhanded Loki's soft buttocks. Loki gasped in pain and tried to move out of Stark's grip but Tony held on to him working his fingers in to the crevice between earning more sounds of pleasure for his work. "Your going to have to start today." He bent and bit in to the soft flesh at Loki's lower back, this time drawing blood. Loki arched his back hardly containing his want. Tony slapped him again harder and the man beneath him shuddered in pain.

"Please..." Loki gasped, trembling now.


	15. Chapter 15

Save me 'casue I'm falling

Tony was flying out the window again. Yep, again. The cold air rushing past him as he contemplated why he had gotten himself in to this mess again. Why had he brought Loki home? Why did he ever think for a second that they could survive in the same house with out killing each other?

To be honest, he thought as the ground came even closer, in was really his fault. Stark had been drunk. It was some fundraiser and he had brought a girl home, not thinking about Loki. 'Course that made quite a scene when Loki got home and found him in bed with some girl. The god had gone off and the result was Tony's flight, falling off the same building by that same hand. He wandered briefly if he should just _not_ call on JARVIS and let him fall to his death. Maybe that would teach Loki to not go throwing people out windows.

But that was crazy, and not the good kind of crazy. Before he could choke out the AI's name blue magic surrounded him and brought him back to the tower and a scowling Loki. "Guess you decided to keep me around after all." Tony's voice was even but there was a edge to it, nearly falling to his death shook Tony up.

"Oh." Loki smile grew. Tony gulped, what did the god have in store for him? "I'm not letting you off the hook that easy."

"What are you going to do? Smile me to death. Talk my ear off." Tony spit.

"Oh I have a few things in mind." Loki laughed. He approached Stark and dragged him on to the deck in a painful grip, that's when Tony saw the ropes. Oh shit, it was going to be a long night.


	16. the end

Round and round I go addicted to the numb livin' in the cold

And there it was again. The bruise. Put there by Loki and his anger. He studied the large purple spot on his chin, the right not the left this time. Once again so different from the previous marks, even when Loki _punished _him he never lashed out in anger. For pleasure yes, but never anger.

He knew he wouldn't see Loki again till Tony saw fit to go and get him. He didn't feel like talking to the god right now. Talking him in to coming back. First Tony had to talk himself in to wanting Loki back. But he knew he would, Tony knew he would always chase Loki back down convincing himself it would be different this time. This time they would be able to stay together, but no matter what he convinced himself of a small part of Tony knew. Knew that it could never be. Knew that it would happen again. Knew that they couldn't help but hurt each other.

But he also knew it was worth it for those small moments of calm and those hot moments of passion link to long moments of pure love. Knew that no matter how many times they did this both of them would come back thinking this was the time. The time to mend things and never brake them.

Would they ever be able to stop hurting each other? Stop running and running from their hearts?

The End

Authors note- So this is my first try at explicit stuff I would really appreciate knowing how it went. If I should do more or if I shouldn't. What could have been better (I know the spelling and grammar suck, so sorry I'm working on getting some one to edit). The song is Runnin' by Adam Lambert. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!


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